disappointed

i very sad now...im crying...just saw her honeymoon pictures...i convince myself again everyone goes there definitely will take picture at each slot like she does, i convince myself she hold her phone with worry, worry i alone so she  pei me...she still cares me...convince myself she didnt change her profile pic bcoz of me too...but about her kissin pic pose..i tot her bf asked so..so i asked her whether she did that naturally or not, but sadly her answer is..she got drunken and duno what she was doing..."wo ye bu zhi dao, yin wei wo he le jiu, dui bu qi , dear" .....her answer killed me deep inside ....im so disappointed